Unfaithful

Some of you may think I've been unfaithful. I get the blog up, I post, post, post, then I drop off the planet. I'm not sure what to say. I'm interested in telling others of my experiences; however, I sometimes don't feel like blogging. In fact, for a while there, I almost felt that blogging was work, and, therefore, didn't want to do it because I didn't have to. A way of controlling a life that otherwise seems out of control.
For all of you out there who still check from time to time. I am here. I am still working my tail off, and I'm still in debt, disgruntled, and dissatisfied.
Hopefully, motivation will smack me in the face soon, and I will begin posting on a regular (or semi-regular) basis.
Until I write again, stay faithful.

:)

Scream of the Day

Thursday: Secretary (Day) / Server (Night)

I can only justify the ridiculousness of humankind by the fact that it is a full moon. All the werewolves have emerged and have shown their fangs.

This morning, a happy little morning here in the Education Department, the phone rang. I happily answered the happily ringing phone to hear a woman on the other end asking to speak with the Department Chair.

"May I tell her who's calling?" I ask sweetly, in my best polite-secretary voice ever

She tells me her name, to which I respond, "And what is this regarding?"

To this she says, "This is regarding me speaking to the Department Chair."

Who says that???

I am doing my job, which is filtering the phone calls for the DC (Department Chair)! When a secretary asks what your call is regarding or what your call is in reference to, we are NOT being nosy, we are DOING OUR JOB!

With this response, I thanked her, pushed the 'hold' button, and went to rant and rave with the DC. Because of the way the person spoke to me, the DC refused to speak with her. (Remember that people! If you're mean to the secretary, chances are the call may not go through.)

I picked up the holding line, and said, "I apologize, however, the Department Chair is unavailable, may I take a message?" At this time, the woman on the other end gave me her number and told me briefly what her call was in reference to--THAT'S WHAT I ASKED IN THE FIRST PLACE!!!! Had she told me initially, she may have been permitted to speak with the DC.

On this same topic, I get A LOT of people who call to speak with the DC, and when I ask them what it's in reference to, they answer, "It's personal." That's unacceptable. I don't care about your situation, be as brief as humanly possible. I don't care! But the department chair doesn't know half the people who call, and all of them say "It's personal!" I'm not looking for your ENTIRE situation, you could just say, "It's in reference to a course." OR "It's in reference to an instructor." OR "It's in reference to a grade." That's all I need! I couldn't care less about you or your situation! I'm only trying to do my job! Let me!

Since I'm on a roll, I'm just going to keep going. In addition, it makes me want to rip my hair out when a student enters the office and says, "I have an appointment with my instructor." I then ask, "Who is your instructor?" The dear-in-headlights look (I get it EVERY time), and the student responds, "Oh, I forgot his (or her) name...uh, something that starts with a "D." What! You are a college student! You are attempting to get your degree to become a PROFESSIONAL and you don't even know your instructor's name????!!!!

I understand getting a little confused in the beginning of the semester, but we are now in week 9 of the semester, and you still don't know your instructor's name? Well, then I guess it'd be okay if I sent you to speak with any instructor? WTF?

Students DEMAND respect. They DEMAND a chance to prove themselves. They DEMAND certain grades (even if they haven't earned it). They DEMAND instructors to bend over backwards at their every whim. Yet, they cannot find it within themselves to know the person's name with whom they demand so much.

Almost-4-year-old Sob Story

I have the saddest and cutest story that will break your heart, but I have to share because I'm an aunt; it's what I do.

My sister has two children, almost-4-year-old Cee (nickname, of course), and 2-year-old Pea (short of Sweet Pea--also a nickname).
My mom (the girls call her Emmy), signed Cee up for ballet, and she signed Pea up for swimming. Ballet was scheduled to start last Friday. All last week, Pea was sick with a gross stomach bug. Cee was very excited about ballet, and knew she had to be strong and well for her class. When Friday came, my sister woke Cee up for school and started getting her ready. Sis noticed that Cee didn't really look well, so she asked, "You feelin' okay?" Cee replied, "Yes, mommy, I want to go to ballet. I have to be strong." With that, Cee dressed, and they headed off to school. My sister works in the same building as Cee's preschool, just in a different room. When they got to school, Sis asked Cee again, "Are you sure you're feeling okay, Cee?" Cee once again replied, "Yes, mommy, I'm going to dance class too-later." (A little Cee-ism.)
Finally, right at the end of the day, Sis gets a call to come to the preschool room. When she gets there, she finds Cee on her knees on the classroom floor, where she had just vomited. Looking pale as a ghost, she looked up at Sis and said as she cried, "I want to go to ballet, mommy. I just wanna dance. I just wanna dance." Sis said she cried as well, picked Cee up and told her that if her belly hurts, she can't go to dance class. Cee was devastated.
Because Emmy was going to take her to the class, Cee's outfit was at Emmy's house. My sister went over to the house and grabbed her outfit and let Cee dance around the house. I was out to dinner with my mom at the time, and the phone rings. It's Cee, "Thanks for my swippers, Emmy, and my 'tard, us dancin in the house!" She sounded happy, definitely tired and sick, but it was sweet to know that she was still able to dance around--even if it wasn't in class. She has a tall mirror in her room too, and Sis said that Cee kept spinning around and trying to watch herself at the same time.
How cute?! How sad?! :)

Time Sucker

Friday: Secretary (Early Day) / Off! (Night)

The Boss Lady in my department always says that someone has sucked the hours out of the day, and she's absolutely right! I'm not sure if little elves or creatures in the walls are the culprit, but something somewhere is sucking every minute out of every day. I don't really have a lot of room to breath. Okay, okay, so I'm being melodramatic, but really.

Something has been on my mind this week, and although I didn't think to blog about it now, I am trying to let it fly from my brain. This week in class, we were talking about having "emotional intelligence" and what that means. We were discussing different types of people and how some can read their emotions and others cannot.
During this discussion, I was using depression as an example, and I stated that there have been times when I've felt depressed, but it wasn't something I ever felt the need to medicate. I took it upon myself to find something (reading, writing, drawing, screaming) to "channel" that depression. It's something I learned to do, however. I didn't know how to deal with it as a child or adolescent, it was something I had to acquire.
I went on to mention that there are people out there who were never taught how to deal with their emotions, or they simply never learned, or don't have the instinct, and are unable to "cure" themselves of their emotional affliction.
A student then mentioned how there are people who are clinically depressed. I didn't disagree with this, but I think he was bringing it up because it is considered hereditary. (Which, I felt fell under the umbrella of those people who don't know how to read their emotions.) Anyway, I think I offended him because then he went on to mention that there are 25, 000, 000 people in this country who are clinically depressed, and he is currently seeing a psychiatrist for depression.
At that, I mentioned that I didn't think all of them were actually clinically depressed. (I personally feel that our country is WAY over-medicated.) I definitely should not have said that, but in the moment that was my opinion, and it came out. I immediately knew that that was not the right thing to say.
He went on to mention that he is a recovering alcoholic and at 25 years sober. The entire class applauded him. I believe he was defending his depression by saying that he was born with it and he couldn't help it (although he never came out and said that, this is just my own assessment of the situation). I then turned the conversation a little, apologizing for my being insensitive, and asked him if I could ask him a question regarding his experience.
I asked him if his drinking was what lead to the depression. He said he drank to get rid of the depression. I then said that I believe, regardless of his heredity, affliction, or diagnosis, he had a choice, and, for whatever reason, he felt, that drinking was the answer. He made that decision. Furthermore, he then made another choice, later in life, to fix his other affliction, and that was to begin treatment for alcoholism.
Regardless of our situation, we have a choice. Always and forever.
Even though I didn't articulate myself very well, I think I may have redeemed myself. He did participate throughout the remainder of the class, which made me feel good. I imagined that if he were truly upset by my statement, he would have regressed from the class discussion, but he didn't.
I'm happy to get this off my chest. I had thoughts of emailing him to ensure that he did not take true offense. I rethought that and decided it wasn't necessary. He's usually the first to arrive, so I think I'll just check with him next week.
Mind you, this conversation spawned from an article we read in class. An article that the class will have to summarize and react upon in essay form. Perhaps our controversial conversation will inspire them. Who knows?

Tomorrow: Off (Day) / Server (Night)

Education Expense

This post connects with a post I published a few days ago.
Students working toward an Education degree are required to do classroom components for their major--they must observe or teach in a school in the community as part of their requirements.
Today, one of the full-time faculty was talking with me about a student who has been corresponding via email regarding her placement site. The student claims that the reason she chose to come to our college was because she works during the day and is able to take classes at night. She had no idea she would have to do classroom components. What?! Why would she possibly think that by being an Education Major, she wouldn't have to work in a classroom? Her additional argument is that she currently works in a public school, and she wants to do her observations in the school where she works.
For everyone out there with this situation, doing observations/student teaching in a school where you currently work is not the way to go about getting a well-rounded education. Taking care of classroom requirements in your place of business is called a biased environment. Besides that, getting experience in other schools will give students a varied perspective of schools in the area. No school is the same, and through obtaining your education, it is up to you to get as many different perspectives as possible. This will broaden your spectrum as a student and open your eyes as an educator.
College is not meant for taking short-cuts. College is meant to provide you will all the training and instruction necessary to make you a well-rounded member in your field.

Paradise

Monday: Secretary (Day) / Server (Night)

This is a different type of week. My mom left for Cancun early Sunday morning. My mother has not left her five children in 25 years. I closed at the restaurant Saturday night and pulled an all-night-er to take her and my three aunts to the airport by 5:00 a.m. Because this is the first time she's actually inaccessible, she felt more comfortable if I stayed at her house. My two brothers are still at home, and although they are 15 and 19 years old, they still need someone here. Not only that, but they're lazy, sloppy teenagers who would destroy my mother's house by the time she gets home.

I came back to mom's and finally fell asleep around 6:30 a.m. I tried to bring everything so I don't have to traipse back to my house. I did forget a few things (like my phone charger!), but so far, so good.

It's funny because I find myself in "mom" mode. Last night I was doing laundry and gathering some things, when I realized that it was passed the dinner hour and wondered if my brother had eaten. He's 15! He'll eat when he's hungry, but like I said, I'm in "mom" mode. He chuckled when I asked him, so I "checked" myself.

I'm just really communicative: I want them to know where I am, and I expect that they'll let me know what they're up to...I don't know...parent stuff. :)

It's weird because I'm not a parent to any degree. I was watching my 6 month old niece this weekend, and I was struggling carrying a crying child, lugging her seat, and trying not to lose the diaper bag. I know that I have a maternal instinct, but I just don't think I'm cut out to be a parent. I can't even remember to feed my brother! (Shit, and I've been thinking about getting a dog...I guess that idea's out!)

Tomorrow: Secretary (Day) / Off (Night)

Summing It Up

Thursday: Secretary (Day) / Server (Night)

My thoughts today are geared toward society and its obsession with technology. Society's obsession with technology is what created my obsession with the tangible (the silver lining, I suppose). What I mean by obsession is that I think we're taking technology too far. My mom even thinks we're going to run out of electricity, and she claims that everyone will be sunk because there's no Plan B. I think she's right, for the most part.

Although I try to take advantage of technology, I'm not crazy about most of it. I remember what it's like to not have it. But because technology has been developing, I've been changing with it...if that makes sense...

Working at the college, we have been presented the idea of doing telecourses (courses taken from the computer, never meeting in a classroom). I work for the Education Department--they teach people how to teach people. How can anyone possibly think that an online education is credible when the degree concentrates on socializing with children? I feel the same about any online program that is geared toward an occupation that deals with human beings (counseling, psychology, nursing, etc.).

The notion of telecourses got me thinking about the human race and it's development connected with technology. There is no doubt that technology has affected our ability to socialize. We are becoming independent creatures, absent from direct communication: no tone, no physical connection. Technology is desensitizing the world. I'm sure it's been said before--I agree. Tie this point in with telecourses.

People need the college experience. Yes, online courses can be helpful for a person who works, I agree; however, getting your entire degree online is kind of ridiculous. (Question: Who really knows if the person who is enrolled is the actual person completing the assignments?) In addition, I think that college is a commitment, and you illustrate your commitment by lugging the books to class, sitting through lecture, and getting a tangible perspective. Going to class allows for interaction, networking.

I commended two of my students because they had apparently exchanged contact information. Over the weekend, one of the students had a question, but she emailed me Saturday night, and I wasn't able to respond until Sunday. She then decided to contact her classmate, and they were able to help each other through...The End. My point is that people become resources for the present and the future. The people we meet are the people who are there to help us through--in many forms. It's okay to ask someone for help. It's okay to learn, and it's okay to make sacrifices for the things you want and need.

It took me six years to get a four year degree. I paid for it myself, with help from Uncle Sam. I got no tuition reimbursement, and I had to purchase books on my own. I worked between 1 and 3 jobs my entire college career. It can be done. Getting a degree that I am proud of was my ultimate goal, and I made the commitment to get it. I think that this "desensitizing" is also affecting our ability to be decisive and make commitments. Without human contact, commitment becomes meaningless.

Deep Thoughts... :)

Friday: Secretary (Day) / Off (Night) Yay!!!